FUNNY PAGES | ‘Both Different Flavors of Dull’: Comedians Declare VP Debate Boring
JD Vance looked like "a business lemur on beta blockers," Stephen Colbert joked
Editor’s Note: This is a special edition of “The Funny Pages,” our occasional look at the intersection of late-night TV comedians with the politics and issues of our day.
The verdict on the vice-presidential debate is in, and it was boring.
Riffing on the encounter between candidates during their monologues after the face-off, the nation’s late-night comedians all poked fun at how sedate the affair was compared to other recent debates featuring Donald Trump.
Trump’s VP pick, Republican Sen JD Vance of Ohio, squared off against Vice President Kamala Harris’s running mate, Democratic Gov Tim Walz of Minnesota, Tuesday evening on national TV.
The late-night hosts mocked the largely respectful banter between running mates as a snooze fest.
“Walz and Vance, they stuck to the issues. They showed each other a lot of respect. It was — it was very boring,” ABC’s Jimmy Kimmel cracked, to laughter from his studio audience. “I’ll be honest, I like these better with Trump, I really do.
“I don’t know that anyone’s vote was changed tonight. Watching a vice presidential debate, it’s like taking your kids apple picking. About halfway through you’re like, ‘Okay, you know what, this sounded like it was going to be fun, but what’s the point?’” the funnyman joked.
Stephen Colbert, on CBS, jabbed the candidates for their appearances on the debate stage.
“Now, Tim Walz had his own version of debate prep. A few hours before the face-off, he was reportedly seen with his Secret Service detail jogging through Central Park, which is why he took to the stage with a Statue of Liberty hat and a $20 pretzel,” Colbert joked. “The VP candidates were both different flavors of dull. J.D. Vance looked like a business lemur on beta blockers, and Tim Walz was a real likable coach, but appeared to be way over-caffeinated. I think the governor done overdid doing the Dew.”
Over on The Daily Show, host Michael Kosta joked about Walz quoting the Bible during the debate.
He quoted Matthew 25:40: “To the least amongst us, you do unto me.”
“Now, for a lot of America, this debate was the first introduction to the VP candidates and we learned a lot about their positions. Like, Walz had this droopy dog position, and J.D. Vance had this position. But they both surprised me a bit. For example, when talking about immigration, Walz quoted a book I didn’t think the Democrats had ever read. I guess it’s called the Bible?”
“Wow. Tim Walz has really stolen every Republican shtick. You know, he’s folksy, he’s into cars, hunts, quotes the Bible. What’s next? He’s going to find out he is the webmaster of nudeafrica.com?” Kosta joked, in a reference to the porn site reportedly used by North Carolina Republican Mark Robinson.
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